Wed, 23 Jul 2003

today's instant vacation...

I'm not at all a proponent of "political correctness." In fact, I prefer to call it "political cleansing."

Today's iv is a political cleansing of some of the foibles of felines. Enjoy! (or not!) 8-)

 =^..^=  =^..^=  =^..^=   
Rob Loach in Greenville SC

When at loss for the right word to say...try silence.
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In the state of political correctness, people aren't "tall" - they are "vertically enhanced." Women aren't "housekeepers" - they are "domestic engineers." Guys aren't "bald" - they're "follically challenged." And on and on this folly goes.

Let's see how we can apply this "game" of the verbal deception of defending some of the widely known activities of cats:

My cat does not throw up hairballs - he is a floor/rug redecorator.

My cat does not break things - she helps gravity do its job.

My cat does not fear dogs - dogs are merely sprint practice tools.

My cat does not scratch - he is a furniture/rug/skin ventilator.

My cat does not yowl - she is singing off-key.

My cat is not a shedding machine - she is a hair relocation stylist.

My cat is not a treat-seeking missile - he enjoys the proximity of food.

My cat is not a bed hog - he is a mattress appreciator.

My cat is not a lap fungus - he is bed selective.

My cat is not a pest - she is attention deprived.

My cat is not a dope addict - she is catnip appreciative.

My cat is not a ruthless hunter - she is a wildlife control expert.

My cat is not mean - she is badness enhanced.

My cat is not hydrophobic - he has an inability to appreciate moisture.

My cat is not fat - he is mass enhanced.

My cat is not lazy - he is motivationally challenged.

My cat is not underfoot - she is just shepherding me to my next destination (probably the food dish).